I have had low self-esteem for a long time. My alcoholic ex-husband constantly put me down, abused me, told me I was not good enough, and demeaned me. Why did I allow it? I guess I thought I deserved it and was afraid to fight back. I felt I had to keep the family together, but in staying in that marriage, I damaged the self-esteem of myself and my children. However, Al‑Anon was my saving grace. There, I learned not to let anyone put me down. I learned that, if I do, it is my fault for taking it. I will not be a victim anymore. If I get confronted or put down, I just respond by saying, “I am sorry you feel that way, but this is me and I like myself.” I still have progress to make on this journey to self-worth and self-esteem, but there is hope in this program where there is no judgment and where I find understanding and loving new friends.
By Barbara H., Florida
The Forum, September 2019
Thank you for your hope!
I have an adult daughter who has struggled with addiction since her teenage years, on and off the wagon. Short and long periods of sobriety. She is currently using, and even when she is not using, she is not seeking help and so it’s only a matter of time before she uses again-has been the pattern. I have told her that my home and property is a drug free zone and she can not come there and use or under the influence of drugs or alcohol. She has sometimes respected that and other times, just shows up and I make… Read more »
I am new to the online Al-Anon Meetings; I have groups I go to, but I found the In The Room meetings. I have been going to Al-Anon for years, but just in the last year I have not missed a meeting until the bug that has the world and put it in lock down. I know it’s not good, because I have been sick with something for 3 weeks now. So I put myself in lock down. I need my meetings to keep my mind in the right place. Without it, I get angry at people. My hubby has… Read more »
Thank you Barbara.H. Florida for your sharing, I can get so much identification for you. 😊💛🌟 Barbara. S. Ireland.
I have never belonged to Al-Anon before but I have heard about it. I’ve been married for 30 years. My husband has UTA, un-treated alcoholism. He is dry but still has the ” ism’s”. My story is like Jude. Short fuse, abusive words, narcissistic attitude. I have 2 grown boys who have suffered the same from him. I’m always trying to fix a “crisis “, usually brought on by his insecurities. I’m sad and hurt all the time and find myself taking and feeling the blame for everything. Second guessing myself. I’m tired of the “blame game”. I always lose.… Read more »
I hear you. I feel the same. My husband is an alcoholic. He’s been sober for 2 years. Some has changed but the anger and hate is still the same. His fuse is short. His words are so harmful. I feel like I should leave but I don’t want to abandon him. He doesn’t see his harmful behaviors. He tells me it’s all in my head. I feel trapped forever in limbo. I don’t want to ruin my family but feel it was never whole. There has always been this deep sadness. I don’t want to be part of it… Read more »
I’d battled – or rather had low self-esteem when I came into the program. With the help of my sponsor and by embracing a higher power most of the time I am a woman with confidence and have knowledge of my worth. What an added bonus of this program. Thank you again!