I have always been a loner—independent and in control of my life. I raised two children alone and considered myself a successful mother. After all, my upbringing was so unpleasant that if I just did the opposite of my parents, I would do everything perfectly.
But something happened on my way to perfection. My daughter turned to alcohol at puberty to self-medicate for manic depression. As she moved into the difficult teenage years, I tried to cover up the disorder and chaos that was taking over our home. After all, from the outside, our family looked competent and successful.
Sharing my life story with others was out of the question. But, after seeing the progress of a relative in recovery, I reluctantly decided to try Al‑Anon. At the first meeting, I realized that my emotions were not unique. I heard experiences that paralleled my own—I no longer felt like I was alone, trying to set things right in my family all by myself.
At first, I worked Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps with my head, but not my heart. It took me some time to realize that the key to serenity was patience and practice. I was so used to coping with chaos that serenity at first seemed a bit boring, but gradually it became a soothing lifestyle and it remains so today.
The most important slogan for me at that first meeting was “Keep Coming Back.” Gradually, going to meetings became a habit. One slogan saved my sanity and my daughter’s, too. They said, “Take what you like and leave the rest.”
By Carolyn K., Ohio
Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism 2019
I have two adult children who both struggle and have been for 20 years. I’m getting so tired.
I struggle between feeling like I didn’t raise them right and filled with guilt, to moments of such frustration and anger. I want them to move away or I will. Hoping this may help. I don’t want to spend my last thirty years dealing with this.
Al-Anon saved my life !
I’ve grown up in the desease of alcoholism . My story is very similar to the original share unbelievable you will hear your story if you stick around long enough. The disease is deadly.
I appreciate reading this. I am only just looking into Al Anon now. I didn’t realise what was happening until recently. My daughter is a mother. She’s 25. She’s in deep. Drinking daily. She’s changed dramatically. From a hyper intelligent beautiful talented woman into someone who is exposing herself to danger hugely. I am scared for her and my granddaughter. She lives in another town so not near enough for me to be hands on helping. I don’t know what to do. I have no idea how addiction affects people. I feel helpless and scared. I too brought up my… Read more »
Thank you for sharing your story. My story is similar and my children got lost in the disease.
It’s a hard thing to discuss even in meetings. I’m still going through the heartbreak of the
loss. I’d like to share more but need to process even what I just wrote
I realized that your story is also my story.