What was a turning point in your Al‑Anon recovery?
May’s topic is, “What was a turning point in your Al‑Anon recovery?”
As always, you can also write about Al‑Anon’s three Legacies. This month features Step Five, Tradition Five, and Concept Five.
Sharings on the Member Blog may be used in future Al‑Anon publications.
New topics are being added each month!
My turning point in my recovery is when I realized that I had to keep going over the Steps. It didn’t work for me to accept a Step, even though wholeheartedly and with serious commitment, and think I was done with that Step. I know now that for me the Steps are to be repeated over and over as my life changes. It is comforting to know that the wisdom of the Steps are there for me whenever I need them.
A turning point for me was when my Sponsor asked “what do you want?” Quick as a flash I replied “I can tell you what I DON’T want…” followed by a long list of all the things making me so miserable. She smiled in empathy and patience, and quietly replied “but I asked what you DO want”. I realised I didn’t know the answer 😊
I believe that the three most important things that boosted my recovery were: accepting and finding a Higher Power of my own, doing Service, and attending lots of meetings. In finding a Higher Power, I was able to let go easier, know that Higher Power is in charge and be able to have patience to see “what will be revealed”. Service work kept me in touch with other people in program that were working on their recovery and thus got me out of my own head by NOT isolating-I find that one of the most destructive things I fall back… Read more »
My turning point came when my husband and I had been in the program about two years. He came to me and told me he was going back to his first wife and children. I was devastated as we weren’t having any problems. When he left I cried a lot and went to many meetings, talked to a lot of people in the program and got lots of hugs. On one particular night I was very depressed and crying and tried to call my Sponsor. She didn’t answer so I called another Al-Anon friend who had a long time in… Read more »
The turning point in recovery for me was asking someone I trusted to be my Sponsor to assist me in learning to apply the Twelve Steps to my life in addition to studying them. Up to that time, I viewed Step One, and recovery, as a theory; with a Sponsor I experienced Step One, and then recovery, as a fact. It was with a loving, nonjudgmental Sponsor that I first received release from the effects that someone else’s alcoholism had on me. Having a Sponsor is the greatest gift I have gotten in Al-Anon and perhaps the most important choice… Read more »
The turning point in my recovery happened when the Al-Anon book “How Al-Anon Works” came out — that book became my recovery “bible” — plus a strong recovery home group with an Alateen panel that came to our meeting the last Friday of each month. Step 1 in “How Al-Anon Works” was particularly powerful. It was no longer enough to sit in meetings and listen and share. I needed to do the actual work of recovery — the Steps and to live by the principles in the slogans. When I worked the program, the program worked me.
After my husband spent 8 days in the hospital and nearly died of kidney failure in January 2022, my expectations were that now he’s detoxed and sober we could do healthy activities together and start over. Less than a month later I found his stash and became enraged. After crying about it in my home meeting, I met my Sponsor. I had been coming to Al-Anon for about 5 years at this point. Several months later after another tearful sharing, my Sponsor taught me that my sharing in the meeting should be to help others with how the program works… Read more »
There have been three turning points in my Al-Anon practice that resulted in big leaps in my growth along spiritual lines. The first was when I started reading the literature. I had gone to meetings for 2 years without picking up a single piece of CAL. Then I quit the program because I wasn’t getting much out of it. Several years later I returned to Al-Anon and purchased the daily readers. Reading the literature was salve to my wounded soul. Daily infusions of this wonderful medicine brought much needed relief and healing. Reading the literature also finally gave me a… Read more »
A turning point in my Al-Anon recovery was learning to keep the focus on myself. I realized that focusing outward on the alcoholic made my life unmanageable. I did this unconsciously because I didn’t want to look at me.
The turning point for my recovery was when I learned the program was about me, not my alcoholic or anyone else’s issues. I finally found a place I could discover who I am and what I like. I could learn to become an adult and take responsibility for my actions. It was and continues to be life changing.
My turning point was having the courage to attend my first Al-Anon meeting and for the first time understanding I am not alone. I didn’t cause it, I can’t control it, and I can’t change it. I can only focus, change, and take care of myself.
There were two turning points in my recovery that brought me to know that Al-Anon was for me. That happened when I first came to the program. Even though it has been many 24 hours ago, I still vividly remember it as if it was just yesterday. The first turning point came a few months after coming to the program. I had lost faith in God and when the Serenity Prayer was said at the meeting I cringed and felt a great discomfort. Even if I was not saying it, I bowed my head in respect for the members of… Read more »
The (first) turning point in my recovery was when, after attending a few months of meetings, I reached out to a member of the group and shared the truth about what my life was like as the child and wife of alcoholics. This woman, who became my first Sponsor, lovingly guided me through the 12 Steps and helped make them a working part of my everyday life. I would call her several times each day with the situation at hand. As busy as she was, she always took my call. We would start at Step 1 and I would work… Read more »
Being of service and speaking on an Al-Anon panel at an AA event was the first time I used the phrase “my recovery program.” That admission and self-discovery with the love and support I received from Al-Anon members allowed me the willingness to use the H.O.W. suggestions ( How Al-Anon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics). I now try “….a day at a time” to practice the program principles and attend meetings to learn new ways —thank you to all who share their experience, strength, and hope and the gems you have shared so I found my “Path to… Read more »
The toilet plunger! That was my turning point. I assumed responsibilities that were not necessarily mine to own. One night, my husband called up to me (while I was on the second floor) that I needed to bring the plunger to the downstairs bathroom. The toilet was overflowing!!!!!! I grabbed the upstairs plunger (yes there was one downstairs) and raced down the stairs. Immediately I was going to “save” the day. I would “fix” the problem for the family! Halfway down the stairs, I stopped in my tracks. The epiphany came. Was this my problem to own? Why was I… Read more »
I am currently at a turning point in my Al-Anon recovery. I’ve realised that I need the program so that I can lead a fulfilling life, which to me means that I go with flow, even if at times I am not at all happy with the flow. It’s helping me immensely in all my affairs because I’m still the sick me wherever I go. Being kind and gentle with myself is coming easily to me nowadays than earlier. In all ways my life is transitioning right now, and that’s where Al-Anon helps me; to cope with the changes in… Read more »
Concept Five: “The rights of appeal and petition protect minorities and insure that they be heard” was initially confusing to me. In How Al-Anon Works, p. 160 on my Kindle version, saying it once is enough. Saying it over and over is controlling. Yup, this was a turning point for me. I was telling you, the other guy, and anyone who would listen! Sounds insane in hindsight and hallmarked how I went from helping to realizing I was being a gossip, hurtful, and over-responsible. Turning it over to a Higher Power (and sometimes needing to sit on my hands to… Read more »
A turning point in recovery was hearing that acceptance does not mean I have to like a situation. This was huge for me. I now allow myself to dislike many things, including people, without giving undue attention to these things. I spent many years trying to fit into this perfected space of forgiveness and empathy. I have room for all of these qualities simultaneously if needed – anger, love, dislike, understanding, empathy, acceptance.
The turning point in Al-Anon happened to me on a road trip to a Woman to Woman weekend in Illinois. I was with my Sponsor and another member of the fellowship. That new friend told me how her Sponsor asked her to take an empty basket along on her visits to see her ailing mother. She took that basket along for several weeks before she asked her Sponsor why she should continue to do this. Her Sponsor responded, “well you keep taking that basket along when you visit your Mom and you keep coming back with it empty”. You see… Read more »
I had been in Al-Anon for years already when I knew I was seriously “stuck” in behavior patterns that were no longer working. I was plagued by resentments and preoccupation with the shortcomings of others. My self-esteem was frequently sabotaged by attacks of shame. In fact, after an Al-Anon meeting another member said, “You need a Sponsor!”. I knew she was right and I began praying for guidance in finding one. Choosing to get a Sponsor and begin working the 12 Steps in earnest with her became a true turning point for me. With my new Sponsor’s willingness and a… Read more »