Tradition One
Our common welfare should come first; personal progress for the greatest number depends on unity.
Please share your experience, strength, and hope as it relates to Tradition 1. The opinions expressed here are strictly those of the person who gave them. Take what you liked and leave the rest. Member sharing on the Member Blog may be used in future Al‑Anon publications.
I use Tradition One in my marriage. When we disagree I ask myself “How Important Is It?” If it’s important, in Al-Anon I’ve learned to stand up for what I need. If it’s not important, I go along with it.
Before Al-Anon I thought that our common welfare should be managed by me. I wanted to set the rules, I wanted to; needed to be in charge, in order to feel that I was an important part of my household. What I discovered in Al-Anon is that I was not allowing anyone else to have a say. I was taking away other people’s right to be an equal, important part of the household. I understand now that in order for my family to thrive, everyone must have their say as equal parts of our group. Our unity insures that everyone… Read more »
Among the many opportunities that Al-Anon offers me is to live in harmony with myself and with others. Tradition One leads the path to harmony by suggesting the creation of unity, this bringing myself and others to a shared state of health, happiness and comfort in our relations and in various situations. This can be done when I keep harmony and unity in all areas of my life: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Those four areas of my life have to be in balance to achieve unity. When one of those areas is «out of balance», the other three are… Read more »
Tradition One shows us the path to live in harmony and this suits me right. I lived in chaos for many years and it tired me, while getting me miserable and very often getting people around me miserable as well. Unity was not easily attained as I had and can still have a tendency to control and could want things done in a hurry and my way. I had to learn to moderate my actions and modulate my voice, so things can progress in a peaceful manner, in order to get the best interest of everybody concerned. Tradition One can… Read more »
Tradition One has been a lifesaver for me, especially this past week. Life is full of disappointments and challenges right now. I wish that wasn’t the way it seemed to me, but it’s the truth of how I’m feeling. The other day I didn’t want to get out of bed. I just wanted to stay under the covers and hide from the world. But right after having that thought, my program and Higher Power stepped in. A quiet question came to me: Isn’t your husband doing a difficult thing today, directly addressing a legal dispute with a neighbor? How much… Read more »
I used to think it was my job to run the family as a mother and the head home manager. I thought I knew what was best for my children, my spouse, my home, my work, my everything. I tried to do everything and ended up feeling perpetually exhausted and under-appreciated. The first tradition brings in the Concept of Unity. This means that I am not solely responsible for everything. It is appropriate to share the household work with others. It means to me listening to what others think is important and hearing what they need to enjoy home. I… Read more »
Continuing with Tradition One, there is nothing healthy or spiritual about complete self-absorption. So, in Al-Anon, we seek balance. By identifying the Spiritual Principles to be balance, unity, and equality. By applying these principles in all our affairs. We use them as tools to help us look at the common welfare of others in setting the boundaries we need to set. By taking care of yourself, you are allowing others to take care of themselves. Leaving you with balance in your life, treating them with dignity to do for them self. Allow both of you to be equal.