Making the decision to come to Al‑Anon was so hard. I had been referred many times, but I was worried about others finding out what was going on in our family. I was ashamed, embarrassed, and so scared.
At the first meeting my husband and I went to, there was only one person there. She was wonderful and comforting to my husband and me but had not experienced being the parent of an alcoholic. She assured us that if we kept coming back and tried some different meetings, we would find a meeting that was right for us.
It took a couple tries, but finally I found one that was right for me. As the meeting started, I could hardly contain my feelings. After the welcome, when I heard Step One, “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable,” I began to sob.
I knew my life was unmanageable. I sobbed through that entire meeting, and afterwards, all those wonderful members kept hugging me and holding my hands. How could I not come back? There were people there who understood. They did not judge me, they did not ask for details, and they did not question my way of coping.
They assured me that all I needed to focus on at that moment was that I did not cause my child’s alcoholism, I could not control it, and I could not cure it. They were just there for me with love and understanding; they held my hand and gave me hugs. I’m so glad I followed the recommendation to try six meetings. The people who surrounded me at that meeting have now become dear friends.
I “Keep Coming Back” because I know I will always have a loved one, family member, or friend who struggles with alcoholism or addiction. I also want the program to always be available to a newcomer like it was for me. I want to be able to give that person a hug or hold their hand and let them know they are not alone. I also continue coming because I apply the program to many aspects of my life. Al‑Anon has helped me grow to be a better person. I know I would not be where I am today without the support of this program.
By Mary H., Minnesota
The Forum, November 2023
Feel free to reprint this article on your service arm website or newsletter, along with this credit line: Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, VA.