Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
Please share your experience, strength, and hope as it relates to Step 7. The opinions expressed here are strictly those of the person who gave them. Take what you liked and leave the rest. Member sharing on the Member Blog may be used in future Al‑Anon publications.
One thing I’ve learned is that God will not remove my character defects until I’ve taken full responsibility for them. When I’m struggling with a defect that keeps coming back, often it’s because I am still blaming someone else for it on some level. Step Four showed me that most of my character defects are defensive behaviors—things I’ve done to survive the craziness, things I’ve used as Band-aids over my wounds. Resentment is a great example. It’s like armor. It’s so much easier to carry a grudge than to admit my real feelings of hurt, rejection or fear. Lying is… Read more »
The first word in Step Seven is humbly and for me it has a great importance. To me being humble means to be honest with myself and know my truth. If I know my truth, I can admit that I am falling short on something. If I acknowledge with humility my reality and work on accepting it, then I can ask my Higher Power for help, To ask Him means that I make a request or put a question forward to Him. Somehow, I invite my Higher Power to do something with me and for me. I have to put… Read more »
I have come to understand that just because I’m willing to have my defects of character removed and I’ve humbly asked Him to remove them, they are not going to disappear right away. If I still have work to do, He will not remove them yet. He will decide when and which ones He will remove. I have also realized that some of the ones He removes come back at times. What this tells me is that I have to trust God’s will for me. He knows what he’s doing. If I take the time to listen, continue to do… Read more »
I realized this morning that “discovering” my character defects discourages me rather than encourages me. I had just finished a Zoom session with my sponsor talking about the fears underlying my character defect of not setting and honoring personal boundaries. After we were done, he said he was encouraged by the progress I am making. But, I honestly shared that I felt discouraged. Why is that? As others have so honestly shared–it’s because I automatically assume that every character defect exposed is one more thing I have to resolve. Each fault revealed is another defect I have to correct. More… Read more »
Step Seven requires humility, which ask that I recognize my faults. After going through Steps 4, 5 and 6, this has become easier. I have become more aware of my strengths and my weaknesses. For me, for too long, asking for help was humiliating and showing weakness, all of this created by false pride. I finally, when finding some humility, had the courage to give my Higher Power the place He deserves in that area of my life. With the recovery, I have achieved in the program, I now feel discomfort when my shortcomings show up. A shortcoming is a… Read more »
Step 7 was a little scary for me. One of my top 3 defects of character is being fearful. My fear has stood in the way of so many things in my life, but especially my faith. When I am living my life in fear, then I am not trusting my Higher Power. This Step is written in past tense “asked”. It makes me think that I do the action and then I let go of the request. My recovery journey has shown me how to get in touch with my feelings, figure out what I need/what I want, make… Read more »
Step Seven “…Humbly asked God to remove my shortcomings.” I am currently working on Step Seven, and it is taking a lot more time for me than any of the other Steps, including Step Four. In the meantime, I am hearing shares and reading Al-Anon literature that give me insights as to how this Step is worked. First of all, I need to accept that I cannot remove all of my shortcomings by myself; even the main ones that bother me (and annoy other people) will take quite a while to ‘re-wire.’ As it has been said in meetings, if… Read more »
Wow July is already here! 7th month and cherishing my Seventh Step of humbly asking my Higher Power to remove my shortcomings. At first I couldn’t do this because I had to get over my old way of thinking – that it was up to me to remove my shortcomings. This is how I was brought up – to be in control and to be responsible! Especially for my own faults. But this way of thinking only put me in a state of Guilt Imprisonment. It was my feelings of responsibility that would trap me. If I was imperfect then… Read more »
I’d like to share what has helped me prepare for and complete my Step Seven: “I humbly ask my Higher Power to remove my shortcomings”. Wow! This Step makes it so clear that I need help and I must ask for it. In the past and in the midst of my disease and of course before coming to Al-Anon, I held onto the wrong belief that I was supposed to fix and remove my shortcomings just as I believed I was supposed to fix my alcoholic and addicted loved ones. I thought both were my responsibility. If my Higher Power… Read more »
I knew I was starting to love and accept myself when I noticed that my inner critic’s harsh voice had softened. I realized I had come to accept all of me – all the good and all the not-so-good parts. I was treating myself with dignity and respect by acknowledging that I had value as a human being and as a Child of God. I was experiencing true humility and now had the ability to have heartfelt compassion for others. I read somewhere that humility is sometimes defined as ‘being teachable.’ From participating in Program meetings and sharing with my Sponsors,… Read more »
Step Seven requires humility, something I did not have before coming to Al-Anon. This lasted for a while after coming in the program and, still today, humility lives in the shadow, if I am not vigilant and don’t pay enough attention to the principles of our program. First, I had to understand the difference between humiliation and humility. Humiliation is to be looked at and made feel foolish or embarrassed, which I experienced many times in my life. Humility is to not be falsely proud and recognize my own faults, which this Step helps me with. Once I had cleared… Read more »