I Made a Desperate Phone Call

I can remember sneaking out to the garage one winter night to check  the cupboards and car trunk for empties left by my spouse. At 3 a.m., shivering in my slippers and housecoat, I searched for “proof” of something that was impacting almost every facet of my life.
With an empty bottle in hand, I made a desperate phone call to my spouse’s therapist, pleading for help and demanding that she do something about his drinking. The next morning I was ashamed of my actions and my emotional chaos. I felt like my rationality was slipping away.
I heard about Al‑Anon in my professional life and thought I had nothing left to lose by trying it. In Al‑Anon, I quickly learned that the proof I had been searching for wasn’t found in empty bottles, but in the form of my insecurity, shame, desperation and hopelessness.
Al‑Anon helps me look within to find saner, healthier ways to cope with the effects of alcoholism.

Melissa N., Manitoba

2017-08-10T13:13:24+00:00 August 10, 2017|Categories: 2018 Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism, Alcoholic Spouse or Partner|


  1. Holly November 2017 at 2:19 pm

    I have done this. Over and over again. And each time, I find what I knew in my gut I would find. That “evidence” that he not only has a problem, but that he feels like he has to hide the severity of it. I thank the person who wrote this. You have inspired me. I am going to go to a meeting and try to get help myself because I feel like I’m going crazy and I know that my response to his disease is not helping him in any way. And the effect that the “obsession” of “catching” him is not healthy for me.

  2. Judi November 2017 at 8:33 pm

    I am so concerned that my husband will kill himself from drinking and pain killer abuse. He had major back surgery and is still in pain. In the past three years he had multiple trips to the ER and surgery. I have approached calmly and supportive but find myself after two falls tonight just screaming at him. I am so afraid. He has a very prominent position so I don’t want to embarrass him. He refused to get help.

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