I Put the Focus on Myself

When my 15-year-old son began drinking, I would stay up and wait for him. The happy young son who loved to play the piano after dinner and read lots of books in the living room was now angry and stayed out until midnight on a good night. Or he didn’t come home at all on nights like this one.

One night at 3 am, I looked out of the living room window, the room dimly lit by a small lamp. I looked straight into my own eyes through the reflection in the glass. It was just like the years I spent when I was growing up. I would get on my bed at home and kneel. I would look out the window to see if my sister was coming home.

I knew I couldn’t do this again and that I needed help. I had suffered alone growing up. With my son, the pain was unbearable. I couldn’t understand why his attitudes had changed at home and school. Blame and confusion filled my days.

The eyes in the window pleaded, Help me! In the morning, I called an Al‑Anon contact number and was directed to a local meeting.

I had no idea what Al‑Anon was. There I found a home and a place to heal from the shame and guilt I felt. It was the first time I heard that I was powerless over alcoholism and shown how to take care of myself.

By Lorraine H., New Mexico

The Forum November 2017

2017-12-04T15:37:46+00:00November 3, 2017|Categories: Alcoholic Child, The Forum|

One Comment

  1. Laurie January 2018 at 8:17 am

    Should I go to Al-Anon? YES I grew up in an Alcoholic home, I did use drugs when I was in an abusive marriage. I went to AA meetings. That was 10byears ago. I currently use Ambien to sleep. My daughter drinks some every night. I believe she is an Alcoholic. I’m watching my grandkids over Christmas break and she told me I’m the one that needs counseling because I HAVE to take Ambien every night. So I’m not sure if I should go to AA or Al-Anon. I believe she drinks because when she was little I was in a physically abusive relationship and she was molested. I found this out after I got out of the marriage. So, I’m not sure where I belong. Thank you for the feedback. Laurie, in Plano Texas.

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