How do you exercise the concept of a group conscience in your personal life?
Affected by the family disease of alcoholism, we may have learned that it wasn’t safe to share our feelings and thoughts, especially with those closest to us. Al‑Anon gives us the tools and principles to ask our loved ones for their opinion, encourage everyone to be heard, and find a common, loving authority in our environment. How do you exercise the concept of a group conscience in your personal life?
As always, you can also write about Al‑Anon’s three Legacies. This month features Step Eleven, Tradition Eleven, and Concept Eleven.
Sharings on the Member Blog may be used in future Al‑Anon publications.
New topics are being added each month!
I use the concept of a group conscience in my family. Although there are only two of us, my alcoholic husband and myself, if there are decisions to be made, we do them together. It is not only my choice, but his choice too. We are both a part of a group, the family group. Working together to find common answers helps my husband as well as me to heal. If not for Al-Anon, I would be the only one making decisions and taking all the responsibility. Now, I share the responsibility with my alcoholic husband which helps his ego… Read more »
I have been asking my family members their opinions more, and have paused to let them express themselves instead of rushing to a solution. If I give my opinion when it hasn’t been asked for, I have to go back and examine my motives for this.
I had never thought about such a subject as being a possibility in my personal life. However, since reading it, I have come to realise that I have applied it in my life over my years in Al-Anon. Before coming to Al-Anon I was the “group conscience”. I decided everything, not giving any consideration to others. I knew better, so I could decide for you. I was self-righteous, arrogant and disrespectful of others. I realise now that I was cheating myself of sharing with others and learning from them, which could have added so much to my life. What I… Read more »
Growing up in an alcoholic family, I was often feeling unseen and unheard. When I visited my friends’ homes, I noticed that their families had discussion and dialogue when they came to the dinner table. I was so envious that my friends were treated as important to their parents. When I found Alateen and then Al-Anon, it was like taking a sip of cool water after running a marathon. To hear everyone’s voices and opinions during business meetings took some getting used to, especially if there was conflict. Once I learned to value others, as well as myself, there was… Read more »
Growing up I was never part of a group conscience. I was told what to do and how to do it – or suffer the consequences if I didn’t. Although my father was the alcoholic in the house, it was my mother who ruled with an iron hand. I was never allowed to express my opinion or ask any questions. As an adult I went the other direction and thought I had the right to be the decision maker, the rule maker, and the dictator of what would happen in my household. Of course that only caused the alcoholic in… Read more »