Concept Eleven
The World Service Office is composed of selected committees, executives and staff members.
Please share your experience, strength, and hope as it relates to Concept 11. The opinions expressed here are strictly those of the person who gave them. Take what you liked and leave the rest. Member sharing on the Member Blog may be used in future Al‑Anon publications.
I looked through the Al-Anon Alateen Service Manual when our group was scheduled to meet around Concept Eleven. I saw a long list of committees which meet to keep Al-Anon on track. I thought about how many committees it might take to keep my life on track and who would be on them. I realized my employment committee was working overtime and there seemed to be multiple chairs. My emotional renewal committee which includes many of my friends had not met in months. The housekeeping committee seemed to have been dissolved. I need more balance and some of the energy is going to have to come from addressing my fear of saying no at work or to addressing why I have made work my God. If only the finance committee met at the WSO. We would stay afloat but not move forward. I want to move forward in my spiritual growth.
I was not familiar with the Concepts until I got involved with service and more after being involved at different levels of it. I am grateful today to have opened my mind to them and applied them not only in service, but in my own recovery.
Concept Eleven was helpful to me in reminding me that I was not responsible for everything around me and that others could have their shares of the lot. The advantage I found, after opening my mind to it, is that the variety of ideas, skills, etc. were enriching, not only for the fellowship and its members, but for me as well. I also came to realise that the creativity, effectiveness, and the end results were much better when working together and being guided by Concept Eleven!
One thing that Concept Eleven also taught me is to be more flexible and have an open mind in my own life. I learned to give others respect and I trust that they can bring the project to a successful end, without me controlling and overlooking everything. I have to practice it with my active alcoolic son, who is different from me as day is to night. I have learned to “zip it up” and have an open mind with him, when needed, without having a limited or restricted mind on what is brought to the table. This has created a healthier and more enjoyable relationship between us.
Thank you Concept Eleven for teaching me to be open to others and apprecialte the ideas, skills, etc, of others. My life is richer and more enjoyable and I am immensly grateful for that.
I participated in a Concepts Study Group last year. After working on Concept 11, I realized I could put it to work for family vacations. I discussed this with my Mom and my older son, who are two of the other people going on the trips. Going with our strengths, I suggested I be the “executive” in charge of booking the resort and the flights. My Mom could be the event coordinator and laundry committee, and my son could be the navigation committee. My older son commented, “What about J”? What does he do?” I said, “He could be a staff member and go where he needed!” They were all in agreement and I loved I didn’t have the whole responsibility of the trip on my shoulders. During one such vacation, I was passing by the dryer when it went off. I stopped and opened it to start folding the clothes. My Mom came around the corner and said, “I thought I was the laundry committee”. I was taken back and then started to laugh! “You are absolutely right and thank you for saying so. Carry on.” Practising the principles in all my affairs, including family vacations, can restore me to sanity.
Concept Eleven made me realize that I don’t have to do everything by myself. For years, I thought that I had to do everything by myself or I chose to do things myself. I had a trust issue and this led me to have too much control over things that were over my potential and my abilities. I lost myself in things that were too much for me, this bringing frustration, anger and resentment toward others and toward myself and even toward life itself.
Today I know that asking for help from others is a blessing and that this also meets the principles and the spirit of our program. Over the years I have gained trust in others, in myself and most of all in my Higher Power. It is in different levels of service that Concept Eleven became really alive for me. I finally understood that others brought to the table talents and gifts that complemented mine and that added to the success of whatever endeavors we were facing. I finally got the concept that I was not in charge of everything and this was, I must humbly admit, a relief!!!!
It feels good to work and live in harmony with others. I know that if we trust each other and trust our Higher Power the project at hand will come to the best end it could have.
The 11th Concept for me means that I can not do all the responsibilities alone and I need to serve without controlling others and do my duty and be flexible and respect others.
Concept 11 makes me realize that it takes a village and the village of Al-Anon is a strong one. Recently, I was part of a Colorado Area Committee to put together a Weekend in Al-Anon event. It happens every year here. We whisk off to a Colorado retreat where there are mountains, a beautiful lake with reflections of fall foliage changing colors, prepared meals and comfortable lodging, Al-Anon and AA speakers, fun workshops, hiking time to connect with Higher Power and loads of fellowship. In the year of State restrictions on size of gatherings due to the pandemic, the committee was faced with potential cancellation. Most of the committee wanted to have the event but some of the committee members were unfamiliar with a platform where we could have the event online. The committee cancelled the live event but knew the Area had an online platform. Needless to say, the Weekend in Al-Anon committee pulled ideas from all its members to present our Friday and Saturday event. The committee asked for help from the Area to make sure our event went online without a hitch and the Area Chair, Web-Site Chair and our Records Chair helped our committee with the process. The weekend was a success with just over a hundred attendees. Without the guidance from Concept 11 to have selected committees, executives, and staff members, all work together, this event might not have happened. As it turns out our members from neighboring states were in attendance, just as if we had a live event. Al-Anon Groups look to these Al-Anon committees to provide ongoing support in various ways, our committee was glad that we could continue to provide our on-line version and share our experience, strength, and hope, this year, to many Al-Anon members that are feeling isolated in this challenging year. Like I wrote in the beginning, our Al-Anon Village is strong.
Concept Eleven had a lot to teach me and still does today. I know and have learned that when we have a project and that many qualified, talented and willing people are involved, the project can get to a more successful end. This was proven to me over and over again in the program and in my life. I had to drop the idea that I could handle a project on my own. Over the years I discovered so many talents and met so many qualified people that I can’t deny the importance of sharing according to what we are talented in.
This Concept goes in opposition to taking all the responsibilities, refusing to delegate, believing to be an authority in everything and not feeling accountable to others whether in my family or in other areas of my life. There were hard lessons for me to learn, as this was contrary to my way of doing for years. Being used to have control of things, the ideas brought about by this Concept required a lot of let go on my part. However, today I embrace those principles and delight in the results brought about, when those principles are respected.
This Concept suggests that we share and cooperate with others, so everybody can have a chance to live an enriching and rewarding experience. I experienced a lot of this in my life and uncovered talents and potential in others, that I would have never known and enjoyed, have I not shared and cooperated with them. I discovered a new world and many new ways to do things.
Concept Eleven also entice us to be organized, while remaining flexible. Fear and lack of trust made me a master at controlling and with an inflexibility that blocked all chances for others to fully participate and to the project to have the fullest results that it could have. With time, I discovered the open-mindedness and the flexibility necessary to respect what is set up by all concerned. I can enjoy more the the project at end and the freedom it gives me to do only my share. This also showed me the richness in the diversity in achieving some tasks and the benefit brought about in trusting the process.
Thank you Concept Eleven for having taught me the respect of others and the grace of giving them the dignity they deserve, when doing only my share in any project at hand.