Cynthia Moreno Tuohy, Executive Director of The Association of Addiction Professionals (NAADAC). Cynthia discusses a professional’s concern for families whose loved ones have a drinking problem, and for the professionals who treat them.
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Loving a person with alcohol addiction can be life-shattering. I could see that the drinking he was doing was affecting me and our family, but I could not see that I needed support and help. Eventually I was blessed to meet a woman who was a sober member of Alcoholics Anonymous and she suggested I go to an Al-Anon meeting. Of course I said, “He has the problem, he needs Alcoholics Anonymous, I’m fine.” But I was fearful, angry, even full of rage and terrified of what alcohol was doing to someone I loved. I drove 40km to my first… Read more »
I can relate to the term feeling selfish. I used to help and try and fix everyone’s problems and came to the doors of Al-Anon very frightened and angry. Feeling unmanageable, like Step One mentions. I kept attending meetings and realized when I was feeling this way it was because I was expecting others’ behavior to change, which I could not control with the principles, Steps, and slogans. Serenity came one day at a time. I learnt that I wasn’t being selfish when I came to meetings and did daily improvements to change myself emotionally and physically. I am the… Read more »
My health care plan covered 20 sessions with a therapist each year. It seemed like it was over just when I was starting to benefit from it. My therapist did the right thing. He referred me to Al-Anon. I went to a couple of meetings. I never heard so much honesty in my life. People were talking about things I would have never discussed in public or with strangers. It was a relief to see that I wasn’t the only person with an alcoholic father and wife, and yet I was frightened and suspicious. I thought there was some kind… Read more »
Many thanks for posting this interview. I have been able to pass on the experience, strength, and hope of Al-Anon to family members, friends, and in my employment, where I have come across distorted advice from medics and other health professionals who try to get the problem drinker to cut down rather than abstain. I find this incredible, but do follow Al-Anon teaching in keeping our meetings non professional. My family of origin is badly affected by alcoholism and sadly only a couple are in recovery. I continue to hope that one day they will seek out to change what… Read more »
My father has dementia induced from his alcoholism. I am angry because his doctor never asked him about his drinking and my father never offered the information. He just kept on drinking and became more senile. Would a doctor’s probing question about my father’s drinking have made a difference? I’ll never know. Alcoholics do what alcoholics do. What I do know is that the bottle took my father as a hostage medically and mentally. Physically, he fell apart and mentally, he became a child. Now, it is too late. My father is in a nursing home because he needs constant… Read more »
As I listened to this interview, I thought about how great it would have been if the professionals I sought help from had told/ referred me to Al-Anon. The doctor could only recommend antidepressants. A marriage counselor told me the term “alcoholic” had bad connotations and that I needed to accept my husband’s decision to continue drinking. A psychiatrist told me that my husband had deviant behavior. And my father referred to my husband as a “sociopath.” I am glad I trusted my instincts to go to Al-Anon. True, I went to save my marriage. But I knew I needed… Read more »