“Introduction of Al-Anon Meeting” podcasts: 4) Why did I feel afraid to go to my first Al-Anon meeting? Isn’t the drinking somebody else’s problem?
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
“Introduction of Al-Anon Meeting” podcasts: 4) Why did I feel afraid to go to my first Al-Anon meeting? Isn’t the drinking somebody else’s problem?
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
I’m 25 and I’m just starting to admit to myself that I might have a drinking problem. I’ve been with my boyfriend now for almost 9 years now, and this is really putting a strain on our relationship. He just wants me to be honest, and stop drinking, and all I’ve been doing is lying about my drinking to him. I finally came clean about it last night, and now I’m terrified he’s finally going to be done and leave me. I want to stop, I don’t want to lose the person who has been there for me more than… Read more »
I want to attend a meeting. I realize I don’t respond to things like a healthy well adjusted person. I bury and hide my families alcoholism so people won’t know I have such unpalatable problems. I can’t put this on the people I love so many of my closest friends have no idea. I moved away and I hoped to have a life apart from this but it’s following me, it’s part of most my memories. My mom dad and sister are alcoholics, mom recently drank herself to death, sis is doing to her kids what my parents did to… Read more »
I am in love with an alcoholic boyfriend and he urges me to go to Al-Anon, but I am afraid. I honestly feel so stupid for even being in this situation. I should just leave him and live a good life but I can’t bring myself to do it. I feel like if I see others who stick around with their alcoholic significant others, I am going to feel even more dumb because really, I should just leave him the hell alone and let him deal with his problem himself. Yet, here I am, unable to leave. I guess seeing… Read more »
I grew up with an alcoholic aunt who I adored and who adored me. I used to hide the bottles and throw away the drinks as as a young child. I now have an alcoholic partner who drinks constantly. She is classy, thoughtful, caring, funny and loving when she is sober, but when she is drunk she is vulgar, selfish, rude, obnoxious annoying, aggressive and confrontational. She has promised her now deceased sister on her dying bed that she would stop drinking. She promised me when her mother was in ICU as a result of a drunk driver crashing into… Read more »
I grew up in a home with two alcoholic parents my whole life, and once a teenager, a brother addicted to drugs. I’m only 17, but I didn’t find Alateen helpful at all because of how severe/intense some of my experiences have been. Well, I recently went to my first Al-Anon meeting, and have gone twice now. I was at my end when I went to my second meeting, and was ready to be done with life. Well, my ride bailed on me, but my HP knew I needed to be there and orchestrated an old friend of mine to… Read more »
I finally did it. I went to my first Al-Anon meeting, and the world did not end. I know that sounds crazy, but I couldn’t seem to work up the courage for the longest time. Like someone else mentioned, I was nervous talking to “strangers” about my issues with my sister’s drinking. I was afraid someone would tell her that I was attending. I worried that she would hate me, and say I was trying to humiliate her and being disloyal. After all, these problems in the family should stay in the family, right? Right – and then nothing changes,… Read more »
I was uncomfortable with posting to Al-Anon because of the possibility that someone might know about my experiences with people who are alcoholics and the chaos and turmoil caused as a result of alcoholism. I don’t know where my fear of people knowing my thoughts on the topic comes from. I don’t have any fears or issues with private therapy one-to-one, but to the thought of participating in a self-help group, group therapy, or any discussions beyond a one-to-one therapeutic approach or friendly conversation is very difficult for me. Sharing in this on-line group has helped me to reduce my… Read more »
I have never attended a meeting but I have consistently researched help on the internet. I always make the excuse that it is too far or I have work. Well a few days ago it clicked that I most definitely need help. I live with my mother who has been an alcoholic my whole life. My father passed away 2 years ago from lung cancer (he was also an alcoholic). My sister is following in the same footsteps as my mother. I have always been the one who spoke verbally about the addiction while everyone else ignored it or manipulated… Read more »
I have been with my alchoholic bf for 6 years now. We are not married, have no kids. I love him so much, but he drinks hard booze, a bottle a night. He is amazing when he is sober and horrible when he is drunk. He admitted he has a problem, but refuses to go to AA meetings. I have my first Al-Anon meeting tonight. I am sooooo scared, very nervous–never had to go to one before. I have no idea what to expect.
I was afraid to go to my first meeting because I didn’t want my alcoholic husband to know. He was already recovering in AA and had encouraged me to investigate Al-Anon. My pride told me that the problem was his, not mine and that by going to a meeting, I would admit defeat. I was too prideful to ask for help even though I felt scared, angry, guilt-ridden, confused, hurt, and alone on the inside. I tried to manage my life with a newly recovering alcoholic by myself. All the changes he was making just made me feel more and… Read more »
I met my husband when he had been sober for 2 years after being ordered by the court to go to AA. He remained sober for 7 years, and then decided he didn’t want to be stigmatized with the label of alcololic and wanted to be able to drink. He thought it wasn’t a problem – he could control it. It started small but soon escalated to drinking a quart or more of wine every night. I yelled and scolded and was miserable for years, and came to the point of desperation. I have been going to counseling and was… Read more »
Today is the first time I went to Al-Anon meeting, even though my husband has not been drinking for 7 years. He lives and works in another town but would come home for the weekend. 4 months ago I came as a surprise visit to his office, since I felt something was wrong and lying to me (my gut intuition). He was not happy with my visit, shouted in front of the office secretaries “you bitch, get out of here”. Ever since then he has not come home, does not answer my phone calls and completely ignores me. He is… Read more »
Hi:
After reading all these comments; I think I am ready to take the first step to my recovery. I have been married with an alcoholic for about 8 years. I still love my husband but I am very angry, desperate for help. I will go to my first Al-Anon meeting tomorrow. I am scared.
I read these comments and am heart-broken. I have been married for 19 years to a wonderful man who will not admit he has a problem. Although he was sober for ten years (after a near fatal car accident), he went back to drinking when we moved to a new town. He always wanted to drink socially. Well, this has spiraled into drinking during work, drinking after work, and when he works “late,” sometimes doesn’t come home or comes home when we are asleep. The drinking and driving terrifies me. I am afraid I will receive a phone call one… Read more »
I am scared and ashamed, mostly because I am still in love with my husband and I am worried that we will grow apart if I get help. I know how selfish I sound; it has all just started to get out of control. Can families survive this?
I was afraid to go to my first Al-Anon meeting because I was so sure I’d hear how I was to blame for the alcoholic problems in my home. I’d been blamed for everything that went on in our house for so long. Instead, I was assured that I did not cause the alcoholism, but I could find a lot more enjoyment in my life than I currently had. Meetings helped me discover how real flesh-and-blood people had bettered their lives, even in those cases in which active drinking continued. As time went on, I found that the Al-Anon Steps,… Read more »
I have been married for nearly 25 years to a man who has habitually found a way to blame me for the problems our marriage has encountered. From money problems to him not believing me, I am the reason for all our problems. I recognized that my husband drank every day, but it wasn’t until about 4 months ago that it hit me that the amount of alcohol consumption has increased drastically. I know I have been raising 3 kids and living with a man who has progressively become more and more addicted to alcohol. He tries to justify his… Read more »
My son has been in and out of treatment centres for 5 years. He is addicted to crack cocaine. I have been going to Al-Anon meetings for 11 months and I meet a lot of people there that go because someone they love is addicted to narcotics. You will meet the person or people that you can relate to, trust me. I meet them every time I go to a meeting. I used to feel so much shame for this addiction, but now I know that it was never mine to begin with. I hope you go to the meetings… Read more »
These podcasts are helpful, especially as I am afraid to go to my first Al-Anon meeting. 46 yrs old and scared, but fear has ruled my life for most of those years. I have a daughter who is an alcoholic, married to an alcoholic, and was married to an alcoholic for 17 years. I have covered up for the alcoholics and I need to learn not to do that. Hoping today is my first meeting!
I am looking into going to my first meeting this week. My boyfirend is a “functionaling” alcoholic. I can’t talk to my family because I know they will just tell me to leave him (being we are not married). I need someone to talk to. My boyfriend has admitted he has a problem, but does nothing. So now I feel lost.