Al-Anon Saved My Sanity

“These people won’t understand a gay partnership—How can I talk to them?”
I was having problems with my alcoholic boyfriend. Although I passed the Al-Anon office every day on my way to work, I said to myself, “These people won’t understand a gay partnership—How can I talk to them?”
When my boyfriend and I broke up for the first time, I finally walked into the Al-Anon office. I didn’t tell them the whole story and I wasn’t crazy about all the God talk, but I realized that these people knew more about alcoholism than I did. I could learn from them. The beauty of Al-Anon is that they could also learn from me.
I attended that Al-Anon meeting through the final break-up with my boyfriend, my parents’ deaths, professional crises and a decision to start a new career in another country. My Al-Anon group saved my sanity, and I am lifelong friends with the members of my group.

Timothy F., New York

2017-08-14T17:03:23+00:00August 10, 2017|Categories: Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism, Alcoholic Spouse or Partner|


  1. Linda S. June 2018 at 3:01 pm

    Looking for help with a spouse that Will not admit his alcohol problem. Seems impossible to do anything as long as they will not seek treatment.

  2. D September 2017 at 5:53 pm

    I’ve been with him nearly 15yrs, we’re not married. I kicked him out for 12mths for him to get help and to realize how much I do for him. And after 9mths he looked like he had finally turned a corner. He moved back in on agreement he would go to the pub 3 days a wk. It hasn’t lasted 24hrs he is in the pub every night straight from work 3-7 and drives home. I’ve reported him to the police for drink driving but they said they need to catch him in the act. I feel such a fool, he has now told me he will never stop drinking and has been drinking since he was 10. He is now 51 but states he isn’t an alcoholic even though his own mother is too. I’m beginning to lose myself again, it feels like I have a lodger in my home. No intimacy, he is doing the exact same thing he did when he lived on his own. Pub, tea, sleeps on sofa stinking of beer.

  3. M August 2017 at 8:28 pm

    I’m so tired of trying to change/help/stop him
    I have no control anymore and my life has been changed

  4. Karen August 2017 at 12:31 am

    I am currently homeless in Portland Oregon due in part to my lack of ability to find a sober healthy relationship. I struggle with asking for an receiving help. I was a nurse and thought I was in a lifelong committed relationship.

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